My Kid Says the Darnedest Things

Lil Z, my 8 year old, says the funniest shit sometimes. Here are some things she’s said lately that I found amusing. I thought they might make you laugh a little.

(I’ll be posting these frequently since she just says the darnedest things.)

-Lil Z (right after I had Lil M):
I thought your tummy was suppose to shrink back after you had the baby?”

Me: “It takes time. This is what my tummy looked like right after I had you ya know.”

Lil Z:
“No way! Are you sure there isn’t another baby in there?”

-Me: “Can you please help me with these bags? It’s hard for mommy to go up and down three flights of stairs.”

Lil Z: “Is it because you’re old?”

-Lil Z: “You should wear this dress to my ballet recital. You’ll look so pretty!”

Me: “I can’t wear that it’s inappropriate.” (It was a very revealing tie die dress. Something I would have worn pre-pregnancy to the beach. Not to mention, I was 7 months pregnant and it would have looked more like a shirt than a dress)

Lil Z: “Is it because you’re old?”
(I’m only 30; why does she think I’m so darn old!)

-Moment I knew I had failed as a parent

Me: “Do you know what song you’d like to sing for your 80′s themed talent show?”

Lil Z: “I think I’d like to sing a Michael Jackson song… Der ne ne ne, ne ne, ne ne, Can’t Touch This…”

Me: “We need to talk”

Stay tuned for more “Funny Shit Sayings”
Said By: My Kid

Sent from my iPhone